Mock exams

Hey guys,

As I am in year 11 I have already had one set of mock exams last year but I am having my second set starting this Friday. In this post I thought I would give some advice about mock exams as they're very stressful, but I will also be answering some general school questions.

Questions
1. Do you like school?

No, I do not like school in general, it is too stressful and I'm always so sad there. However I like my school. My school failed ofsted so it is classed as a bad school however like most bad schools it means the staff care so much about each and everyone of you. They don't expect you to reach unrealistic targets but instead they will guide you so you can reach the targets you set yourself.

2. What are you excited and/or nervous for this year?
To be honest at this moment I am trying not to get excited for anything as I need to focus on other things like revision, but I am seeing my best friend on the 12th December and I am just so excited about that. I am nervous as I am applying to college and I want to get into a good college but I just don't think I'm smart enough

3. What Subjects are you taking?
All the subjects I have are Art and design, Biology, Chemistry, English Language, English Literature, History, ICT GCSE, Mathematics, Physics, Religious, Spanish

4. What's your Favourite Subject?
Honestly I don't really like any of my subjects. But at the moment I am enjoying Art the most as I am such a creative person and I am working on my final piece which will allow me to be extremely creative.

5. What's your least Favourite Subject?
My least favourite is Physics as I don't enjoy any sciences and find them extremely confusing. On top of that I have it as a double lesson on Friday morning

6. What's your schedule like?
The normal timetable is set out like 1st period, 2nd period, Break, 3rd period, 4th period, Lunch, 5th period. However during exam time out lunch is changed until after third period instead of after 4th. Each of our lessons are an hour each. On Monday I have Maths, Biology, PE, English, Art. Tuesday I have English, Spanish, Maths, Religious, Chemistry. Wednesday: Chemistry, Religious, IT, Spanish, Maths. Thursday: Biology, History, English, Art, PE. Then Friday I have Double physics, History, IT and English

7. Do you do Extra Curricular Activities?
No, not anymore. Unless revision classes count.

8. What's your favourite thing about your school?
As I said earlier all of the staff really care about you and push you to succeed in a motivational way not a threatening way. They always care about your wellbeing and they realise that you cannot achieve your potential if you are not well. Also they will always give their time to you. They will stay in for hours after school, come in early and on weekends to support you in your work.

9. Tips on how to survive a Boring Lesson?
My tip is to try and concentrate. Do what the teacher is asking you to do because it is important to get as much practice as possible. If that still doesn't work then try to make the lesson less boring.

10.What Grade were you in when you first started wearing makeup to school?
I wore tiny bits of makeup on and from year 7 to year 10. Then in year 10 and this year I have started wearing a lot more makeup.

11. Where do you like to go shopping for Back To School Supplies?
Literally anywhere that sells cute stationary.

12. What are 3 non-beauty essentials you have to carry in your backpack?
My inhaler so I don't die, a notebook/ diary and tissues as I am always ill.

13. What are your School Related Goals?
 I want to be more confident and pass all of my GCSEs

14. What do you want to do when you Graduate?
I want to go to college and study psychology, sociology and English literature. Then train to be a teacher or something else where I can work with children.

15. How do you balance Friends, Family, School and your Internet life?
I just go one day at a time and try to do my best.

This is all I'm going to write today so thanks for reading,

Scarlett x

My horrible college experience

Hey,

Today I visited a college in the city centre which I didn't particularly want to go to but I thought I would apply there as a back-up. This college only did BTECs for 16-19 year olds which meant I could only pick one thing to study, so I picked Early years & Childhood studies.

The first thing I noticed about the college was that it resembled a hospital. There was so many rooms and it was so neutral coloured. Any large open areas (there wasn't many) were occupied with seats which made them look like waiting rooms. To make it worse the classrooms were tiny which meant that they were really claustrophobic feeling. On top of that they made me think of those meeting rooms in hospitals where you only go in for the doctor to tell you bad news.

When I spoke to an early years staff I found it extremely awkward as she made me sit across from her on this table and she was speaking to me like I was a five year old. She did not seem approachable, or kind in that matter. She seemed very stern. When speaking to her it made me think of when your teacher keeps you behind after class and has the conversation that you aren't trying, your work isn't good enough or you're going to fail.

The fact is not one part of the college seemed approachable accept the art department and I don't even want to study any type of art at college.

Scarlett x

Talking about my dad- part 2

Hey,

I suggest that you read part one first, so you understand what has been going on.

During this time, I contemplated running away from home every day, I would try to stay at peoples houses as much as possible. I used to wish that he would just leave, as bad as this sounds, and never come back. I didn't want to live in the same house hold as him, the way he made me feel made me not want to live at all.

On the 11th of march, which is 6 days after my birthday,  he called me a piece of shit again. But not just that, he moaned at me for going to the toilet, he moaned at me in front of my family and they just watched, like it was completely normal. It seemed as though he takes out his anger on me but yet no one seems to notice, no one seems to care. I wrote "I'm tired of crying in the bathroom because of him. I'm so, so scared of him"

By this time I hadn't told anyone (I know in my last post I said that I had but I have just re read my diary and realized I was still alone in this matter)

In June it was still continuing and I was drained. I was so exhausted from the constant terror I felt. I was fed up from the ridicule and I just wanted my dad out of my life. June was the month of mocks and on the 15th we found out our maths results. I got a B which I was so proud of because I find maths really hard. when I got home my dad was sitting there and as soon as I walked in he started shouting saying a B wasn't good enough. (bear in mind my brother is smarter than me but he only got a C as he didn't study but my dad didn't say anything to him.) He said that I was a piece of shit and that I was stupid and needed to get As in everything.

I continued to avoid him but I couldn't keep it in. So that's when I contacted childline and on the 9th of August I got told the most hurtful thing I had ever heard...

Scarlett x

Im sorry

Hey,

Isn't it sad when you are hurting so much you can finally say that you are used to it. But I'm just fed up of hurting and I just don't want to hurt anymore. I don't want to have to wake up, I don't want to have to smile, I don't want to laugh, I don't want to go to school, I don't want to apologise anymore. I am far past the point of saving because I have sunk too deep. I am not drowning anymore, I have drowned and I am lying lifeless at the bottom of the water. My body may be walking along the street but my heart has gone. I am sick of crying, tired of trying, yeah I am smiling but on the inside I am dying. However I will continue to mutter the words "I'm fine" every single time you ask whether I am okay. I am not fine, I am far from it but isn't that just what you want to hear.

I'm sorry.

Scarlett x

Talking about my dad- Part 1

Hey,

Today's post is something I don't really talk about but I just wanted to get it out in the open because I find holding things in really hard.

It all started half a year to a year ago. My mom had started working in the mornings so whenever I got up she was not there, it was just my dad. Every single morning I would come downstairs and get my breakfast and my dad would be sitting there, as though he was waiting for me. I would get my cereal and eat it in silence. Too scared to speak. Then he would begin to shout. It would be about anything and everything, he would blame me for things, say its my fault him and my mom wasn't as close anymore and that I'm not the way he wanted me to be. As it continued I got more and more scared of him to the point where I would hide from him and avoid him at all costs. I was terrified of him, I got exhausted from the constant stress, to the point where I worried for my safety. I didn't put it past him to hurt me, instead I was expecting him to hit me. Whether he was being extremely clever I don't know but he never did hit me, not properly. He would push into me purposely walk into me but never anything which wasn't an 'accident'

As I felt that I could confide in my pastoral manager in almost anything it slipped out to her and I ended up telling her everything that my dad did to me. The first thing I told her is that it worried me how often he shouted at me, how unsafe it made me feel. I told her that I dreaded being at home and how I used to hide from him. Then on the 21st of April was the first time he said it. The first time he called me shit. And almost as if it has been tattooed in my brain, I cannot forget and I cannot un hear it, but most of all I cannot forgive it. I cannot forgive it because that was the day I tried to kill myself and I cannot write that in any nicer words because that is simply just the way it was. Only a few days later I came downstairs to him shouting again. In my diary I wrote "he shouted at me so much that my body felt, as what I imagine, a heart attack to feel like".

It was hard coping with this every day. It was not just physically enduring but it was mentally challenging as I was always terrified.

Scarlett x

Pinterest

Hey guys,

My account still hasn't been fixed so I still cant post photos. As I love photos so much I couldn't bear the thought of this so I have decided to make a Pinterest account where I will post photos related to posts. Anyone can view my account even if they do not have a pinterest account.

So if you want to check out my pictures when I post them then this is my account:
https://uk.pinterest.com/thelittlethingx/

Anyway thanks for everything guys,

Scarlett x

How much beauty can be held in the sky? - Poem

Sometimes the prettiest things,

Lay just out of sight.

You never think to lay your eyes on them,

You will never see the delight.

 

What will stop you from looking beyond the barriers of which everyone looks?

 

You're preconceptions,?

You're prejudices?

You're preconceived thoughts?

 

Step over the lines,

Step out of the box,

Walk the paths which haven't been walked.

 

Don't follow the crowd,

Walk alone,

You will find your true home

 

Just one night look at the sky

And you will see,

That true beauty is all around us,

But only for some to see.

 

 

This poem and all poems I post are my own so please do not copy without my consent or without crediting it as mine. Thanks x

Disney Tag

Heyy,

I am such a Disney lover so I thought this would be a perfect tag for me to do. Hope you enjoy!

#1 Favourite Princess
At the moment my favourite is Belle, I just love her so much!

#2 Favourite Prince
Flynn Rider from Tangled

#3 Favourite Couple
Rapunzel and Flynn

#4 Least Favourite Princess
Ah this is really hard as when I was younger I really didn't like Cinderella but now I love Cinderella. I would have to say Eudora from princess and the frog simply because I know nothing about her!

#5 Least Favourite Prince
The prince at the start of Frozen! Does he count?

#6 Least Favourite Couple
My least favourite would have to be Snow White and her Prince.

#7 Favourite Dress/Outfit
Aurora, I used to dream of wearing her dresses when I was little as she was my favourite princess.

#8 Least Favourite Dress/Outfit
I would have to say Mulan...

#9 A Princess Who Inspires You
All of the princesses inspire me in a different way (which I will write a blog post about soon!) but I would have to say Rapunzel

#10 Worst Decision Made by a Princess
Probably Ariel, she just isn't a good role model and makes bad decisions all the way through.

#11 A Villain You Feel Was Justified in Their Treatment of [the] Princess/Prince
Ursula as Ariel was the one who went to her.

#12 A Princess You Would Like to Trade Places With
Definitely Belle

#13 A Princess Whose Life You Would Hate to Have
Cinderella as it must of been really hard for her to be treated that way and I really sympathise towards her.

#14 A Princess You Think is a Bad Role Model for Young Girls
Ariel! She is not grateful for the things she has, she crashes parties, falls in love with a man for his looks, only cares for materialistic things, Okay I'm done

#15 Favourite Tiara

Cinderella's tiara

#16 Favourite Song Sung by a Princess (can include duets)
Would have to be when you wish under a star (if that's what its called!)

#17 Least Favourite Song Sung by a Princess (can include duets)
I love all their songs, even this one, but if I have to pick I’ll say When will my life begin. It was just too poppy for Disney but the end is so great!

#18 The Princess With Whom You Would Be Best Friends
Belle or Rapunzel.

#19 The Princess With Whom You Would Be Frenemies
None. I love them all.

#20 The Princess You Would Openly Hate and Be Enemies With
As I said, none.

#21 The Princess You Would Dress As for a Halloween/Costume Party
Belle, because she’s the only brunette.

#22 List Three Admirable Qualities About the Princess You Named on Question number #4
Merida is brave, she knows what she wants, and she seems to have what it takes to be a good queen.

#23 A Princess You Feel Didn’t Deserve Her Happy Ending
They all deserved it. They are all good people who deserved a happy ending.

#24 The Happy Ending You Feel Didn’t Make Sense/Was Too Easy
None of the endings were to easy. I mean, if they executed Mulan because she was a woman this wouldn’t be a Disney-movie.

#25 Favourite Sidekick
Sebastian!

#26 Most Interesting Story
In my opinion it is Beauty and the Beast

#27 Best Singing Voice
Cinderella just hits it for me.

#28 Edge of Your Seat: The Moment You Find Most Exciting
Literally every Disney film has me on the edge of my seat, probably when Rapunzel escapes in Tangled.

#29 If You Were a Disney Princess, What Would Your Story Be?
Belle’s story!

#30 What Do You Want to See from the Next Disney Princess?
Just a nice, caring girl, hopefully one that will promote education and hard work to the young girls and boys who watch it.

Thanks for reading!

Love, Scarlett x