What you actually want to hear when you're sad

Hi,

For yourself

Any time I have wrote posts about 'it gets better' I have been in a good mood. Now I have returned back to being sad all the time I realised that doesn't help at all. That makes you feel worse, so I am sorry. Today I am going to be writing a post about what you actually want to hear.

It's okay to be sad. It's okay not to be okay. You are not choosing to be sad but you are and that is okay. It's okay that you don't understand why you feel that way. It's okay if you feel alone with so many people around me. It's okay for your heart to ache, (well I think it is anyway, this happens to me and I'm fine... ha no- but you know what I mean)

It is completely normal in this situation to want to hide away and be alone. Often you will lie about how you are. Maybe you want to say how you feel but have difficulty doing it or you don't want to hassle people. Maybe even both. People will often lie about how they feel. E.G.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine" no I'm not okay

To say to someone else

If someone has told you they are/ think they're depressed and you don't know how to respond then I hope this will help you.

• If you want to let them know that you are there for them. Then you can literally just say I'm here for you or you're not alone with this. (Personally I prefer the first one)
• Let them know that they're meaningful to you. By saying something like "you are important to me". When you are depressed you might feel worthless (even though you're not) so letting them know they mean something to you will make them feel less anxious that you're judging them.
• If you don't know what to say ask them if they want a hug. I know that sounds really simple but it can be really helpful. In that situation they will probably be really upset as telling someone is hard so it can make them feel less upset.
• Tell them that you are not going to leave them. Or that you can get through this together.

I hope this post was helpful. Thanx for reading,

Scarlett x